We Love We Grieve We Grow 2
We Love…We Grieve…We Grow – Part 2
What do you do when your whole world has been turned upside down?
“Remember him – before the silver cord is severed, or the golden bowl is broken; before the pitcher is shattered at the spring, or the wheel broken at the well, and the dust returns to the ground it came from, and the spirit returns to God who gave it. ‘Meaningless! Meaningless!’ says the Teacher. Everything is meaningless!’” (Ecclesiastes 12: 6 – 8)
“When Mary reached the place where Jesus was and saw him, she fell at his feet and said, ‘Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.’ When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled.” (John 11: 32 – 33)
Loss shatters our assumptions about safety and security and many times the loss seems “meaningless”. In John 11:17-44, the sisters understood that Lazarus would rise again, but they couldn’t understand “why” he had to die now! The timing made no sense to them and further it made no sense that Jesus couldn’t have come to keep Lazarus from dying. The “timing” associated with death often makes no sense to us. The same could be said of Stephen’s death at the end of Acts 7. The brothers who buried him and “mourned deeply” for him most surely had to work through their mix of emotions and thoughts regarding his death (Acts 8:1-3). Review the Bible’s description of Stephen in Acts 6 and 7. Those mourning his loss may have been thinking: “Stephen was so young and powerful. His faith was amazing! Everything he touched turned out well and now he’s dead! This is crazy! Just imagine what more he could have accomplished! Why couldn’t Jesus keep him safe?” Loss shatters our assumptions about safety, security and meaning.
Not only must his death have seemed meaningless to them, he died in such a “traumatic” fashion (Acts 7:54-8:1). Trauma adds another layer to grief often making it a more “complicated” process for those who are grieving. Stephen was brutally “murdered”. His death was already hard to take; the brutality of stoning just compounded the tragedy. Sure, the brothers had that certain hope (Hebrews 6:19) in their hearts that Stephen was with Jesus, but even with that certain hope; the hurt, confusion, sadness, and anger associated with the loss would still be tough to handle. They would need time and support to work through it.